Secret Files Living a double life did not always come so naturally to our Inter-departmental Man of Mystery. As he reclined in his swivel chair and gazed wistfully at the dancing flame of the Bunsen burner, he thought back to his early days in Minsk. "Damn it, Romanova," he mulled, "the E1B-19kD virus was my masterwork!"

Secret Files Adam Komorowski's research interests include type V antifreeze proteins, killer T cells, adenocarcinomas, and whether martinis really taste better if shaken. He is the President and CEO of a large multinational real estate holdings company, and a well-known philanthropist. He divides his time between Toronto, Rome, and agarose gels.

Secret Files Eric Cao enjoys experimenting and secretly (not any more) wants to play around with the laboratory reagents when no one is looking. He loves hanging around with friends and listening to a variety of underground music. In the future, he hopes to go into research concerning disease cure and prevention.

Secret Files When Nicole Cyhelka is not unzipping genes with helicase, applying gibberelin to stimulate stem elongation, and studying the insertion of alpha helices in beta barrels, this chemical engineer turned synthetic biologist (read: 'mad scientist') slips into an evening gown and jets off to Monte Carlo to try her hand at a high stakes game of baccarat. They say diamonds are forever, but who ever said it was easy to get a sponsorship?

Secret Files Moustafa Abdalla is an avid gardner; primarly cultivating hyacinth, various Arabidopsis species, and his ego. He is a prominent banker for SMERSH, and conducts regular business in Germany under the name "Herr Ziffer"; he is fluent in English, French, German, Italian, and Arabic. When not entertaining CIA agents in his compound in Munich, he performs northern blots in his spare time.

Secret Files Nusrat Nowrin is one of the alleged suspects wanted in connection with the 5 July Massacre of untransformed DH5α at the infamous Petri Dish Arena. Thanks to an abnormally high ampicillin resistance, Nusrat is still evading capture. A colony, who wished to remain anonymous, reported: “We will keep on forcing transformation until she gets arrested”.

Secret Files More than anything, I try to emulate Becky Sharp from Vanity Fair. She was an uppity social climber with a ravenous appetite for wealthy men; I too am a mountaineer of sorts (though only of knowledge and books - a slightly more reliable means of 'getting ahead' in the world, I should think). The uppity part is entirely up to who you talk to.

Secret Files Abby is a self-described "weekend warrior mechanical engineering student" feeling out of place in the biochemistry department and loving every second of it. Her research interests include why the centrifuge tubes are so hard to remove and if it really is possible for engineering students to live a balanced life. She currently divides her time between lab work, an engineering firm – if you knew the rest we'd have to kill you.